Many Congratulations

Champagne flutes for everyone!

Champagne flutes for everyone,

For toasts in praise of all our fun,

In cummerbunds, that do appraise

Our stupid ranks and useless ways.

A haze of rites of passage through,

A circlejerk of sticky goo.

Applause for nothing—unearned glee:

The faggotry of pageantry.